It’s Saturday morning. We have a festival we are supposed to be meeting family at in just 2 hours. I didn’t sleep well last night because I was up all night putting outfits together, packing snacks, trying to find the missing cookie monster shoes and worrying about everything that could go wrong today. The hooligans are refusing to get dressed, refusing to eat breakfast, refusing to stop screaming at each other and I can feel it. I can feel the tears starting to well, the tightness in my chest, the heaviness of my limbs and I know if someone even breathed in my direction, I would shatter into a million little pieces. I shove it all down and force everyone in the car to go have an amazing day making memories with family.
And you know what happens? By time we got home, I have yelled at my kids more than I have smiled. My husband and I aren’t talking to each other. Once I get the kids to sleep, I sit and cry in the bathroom wondering why I can’t be the type of mom who has it all together and can pull off a fun day out and about.
And you know what I have finally learned? I can be that mom. If I only allow myself to cancel when I need to. If we aren’t even able to make it to the car without everyone fighting and screaming, chances are it’s only going to continue once we leave. And you know what’s not going to make great scrapbook worthy memories? Tear stained faces and just completely done parents.
So I skip it. Sorry, not gonna make it today! I allow myself to not be perfect and on top of everything 100% of the time. I allow myself to be more important than an outing cause, you know what? My kids enjoy the park just as much as the peach peach festival. My kids enjoy slide races more than fighting with me all day. Usually, when my kids act this way when we have had a busy weak of being out of the house and they need that day to relax, paint, have pizza for lunch and watch some Dora and we enjoy those memories just as much.
So, allow yourself to say no or cancel at the last minute. Because, you are important. Your mental health is important. You don’t want to look back and only remember yelling at your kids as you drag them from plan to plan. You want to remember relaxing on the couch watching Dora the Explorer.